There’s no team in I.

odd-one-out

I have certainly noticed on my journey that I tend to put a lot of faith in people even if they haven’t earned it or asked for it. I think it’s something I’ll never stop being able to do which I think is born from just how I am and how I was raised. I have never had that whole ‘I’m alright Jack, screw you’ mentality. It just doesn’t sit right with me. People that make out they are team players but are only looking out for themselves. yes of course we should be doing that but not at the expense of our fellow man. Money is the main protagonist usually in this, what people do to save themselves a few royals which is fine. Money means a lot to a lot of people. I hope it keeps you warm and insulated in your coffin. My peace of mind will do me just fine thank you. Now don’t get me wrong, I like money, I like earning a lot of money and I enjoy spending money but I could never put my money over someone elses need, I’m talking core needs, the basis of our existence.

Christmas this year was something very much like a movie for me. Literally the full set of events that we absorb when we watch Christmas movies as we’re hunkered down on our sofas getting into the swing of things. Firstly I got stiffed on some money, this felt very much like Clark Griswald in the national Lampoons as I was going to utilize this money in a very specific way and in not receiving it, it kind of turned all of my Christmas plans on it’s head and having to re-arrange everything at the eleventh hour. Then the next day I set off to collect my snowboard from it’s winter service ready for it’s first outing of the season. that was all good, picked it up as planned, paid Georgie boy and head for home only for the engine on my car to quite literally go pop. I’m no mechanic but I know when I hear an expensive pop. There I sat for the next six hours waiting for a recovery vehicle on the day I had set aside to do all of my Christmas shopping. Yes yes, I should have done it all earlier  but where is the fun in that?! By the time me and my new born again Christian recovery driver friend got to the garage their shutters were down and there the car will sit until at least the 27th before it gets plugged in and I’ll find out how much the pop will be. We pushed the car into place up against the gates, I grabbed my board and began the walk home. Let’s say I had a… rye smile as the recovery driver drove past me and then turned past my house as he went on to his next call. It raised a smile that’s for sure.

That is probably a very current example of how I have changed and grown recently. Last Christmas was horrific, I just wanted it over and done with but this time around I can’t wait for it. As I am writing this it is Christmas Eve but I know it wont reach you until early January so it may seem a little past tense to live to third person. It’s a bit choppy but for me it’s trying to document what’s going on and how I feel in the here and now. I’m smiling, outwardly smiling. Christmas is going to be a great period of downtime surrounded by everyone I love and then as I head up the mountain to see in the new year it truly does feel like I’ll be bringing about a new phase in my life, in my development and my career.

Like the sequence of events with the money and car right on top of Christmas, that could  quite easily be more than enough to crush spirits or cause a tantrum but I just rolled with it. There was, is no point creating to things happening beyond your control. Everyone will get their presents and if the car can’t be fixed I’ll but a new one. No drama. That’s what it’s about, letting it wash over you. Regardless of the variables or circumstances. It’s training yourself to react in a positive manner, not throwing your toys out of the pram or throwing the towel in because the problem is still going to be there when you’ve calmed down. Process the facts of the event, remove those bits that are irrelevant and look logically at what is left. A problem, no matter how big it may seem can be broken down to its component parts and tackled in bite sized pieces.

So when this reaches you we will be into the new year, working as we do on ourselves and looking to make ourselves and the world around us a better place to be. Happier in our own skin, more content and fulfilled in that process to continue in the refinement of ourselves as we adapt to what happens to and around us each day. Are you happy with how things are going for you? Are things heading in the direction you would like them to be? Even if the answer is yes it is something you can’t sit back and rest on your laurels with. Life, happiness, success, whatever measure you are wanting is achieved by consistency and the willingness to accept that wanting it isn’t going to be enough. Everything requires work, and pro-active work at that, not reactive.

Look at how far you have come already, even if you only decided today you wanted to improve how your life is going, that decision alone has put you on a new path and that path, that shift is progress in itself. you made a decision and reinforced it with action. That is how it works, you push something and somewhere something moves. That is important to remember, you may not see what has moved but rest assured something did. Every action promotes a reaction, but be mindful that applies to positive and negative influence. So make those moves with a positive mindset. Start sewing the seeds of what you want and where you want to be but don’t sit back when you’ve done it and expect anything to flourish. Tend to it, tend to your work and input. Keep feeding the system with ongoing positive effort. Soon you’ll see those shoots start to come through.

So don’t let that knee-jerk reaction over rule you when something comes along and disrupts your plans. I was awful for that, they’d be toys everywhere as I had my strop. I’d be in the darkness for days and when I surfaced I’d expect everything and everyone to be fine. Not really going to play out like that really is it. It took me a long time to learn that. So as I said, try and roll with it. A clever man once said to me, imagine you are standing in life’s river, if the current feels like it is moving you in a direction you don’t want to travel in or not ready to travel in then move from the main flow. Step closer to the bank when you can feel your footing, where you can take the time you need and when you’re ready step back into the main flow. That is life in it’s simplest terms, you don’t have to be swept away in life’s current just because it feels like that is going to happen. You have the ability to at any time say; ‘ No, I’m not ready to tackle this how I am right now’. Take a little time to step back and process things.

The more we practice life the better we become at living it. taking things for granted or assuming things will be or happen just because we want them to will ultimately be a waste of time. Application and will. You can’t alter life’s flow but you can create your own waves, splashes and ripples, and you certainly can travel it at your own pace. Yes life will plod on regardless of whether you’ve decided to join in or not and that is reason to seize everyday and every opportunity because in the blinking of an eye those choices and options may no longer exist. That is why now I don’t lose any sleep over those willing to short change me with something as insignificant as money. If you value that over the value of my services or my friendship then I wish you well, I hope it brings you the happiness you seek and I’ll be on my way.

Put food in the mouth of someone hungrier than you, put water on the lips of someone thirstier than you and when that time comes that you need it more you will understand how they felt. Don’t fill your cupboards when you belly is already full.

So this year I will continue to live by this mantra, roll with life at my pace, accept that others will have different agendas. Take what I need, then leave some for the next man.

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